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Finding Passion

Personal Diary

Many blogs ago I wrote about politics, and slowly, perhaps inevitably, I grew so angry and despondent I spent all day every day angry and spoiling for a fight. It was no way to live, and I eventually packed up shop and never shared my opinion on current affairs again.

Today, aside from my wife, there are few people on this Earth who actually know what I believe, which is just the way I like it. I’m far more interested in finding common ground, or better still, providing support to others in need, than stepping onto the battlefield of internet discourse. God knows there are more than enough people sharing their opinions online. There’s no need for yet another angry wail in the darkness.

After the political phase I took an interest in technology – particularly online technology – and became a tech blogger. I enjoyed that far more, and for much longer, but eventually my employer began to take an interest in the same topics, and my hobby passion soon became work, which gradually took the sheen off. In time, I stopped writing about that too.

And yet, my wife has often said I’m happiest when I’m writing, which makes it a true travesty that I do it so little these days. In the past I wrote because I wanted to be heard; then I wrote to analyse and explore emerging trends in my sector. With those two phases behind me, I wonder what’s left.

Like many others, I’ve spent the last 2 years in a limbo of anxiety and fear, constantly hoping the pandemic will run its course and leave us all alone, yet increasingly falling prey to pandemic fatigue and hopelessness. With politicians now talking about the “new normal,” I’m not left with much optimism, and the idea of holding on just a bit longer no longer seems like a productive solution.

So today, I return to a tool that’s always helped me process complexity, and work through blockages – writing. Not to stand atop a soapbox, or advocate for the new shiny online tool, but to find my way forward during a difficult time; find passion, not just begrudged endurance.

My plan is to post my thoughts every morning for the next two weeks, to hopefully develop a rhythm and flush out my mental pipes. I have no idea what will come of this, but clearly a different strategy is warranted. So I hope this works.

2 thoughts on “Finding Passion

    1. Thanks, Wendy! Learning and thinking through writing and reflection are processes I come back to time and time again – almost as a rediscovery – and I never get tired of it. I do often regret the periods of procrastination in between though! Hope you’re well! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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